Chapter 1
Bruh.
I was lying on my bed, scrolling through TikTok, and I clearly knew that there was a bunch of late assignments and papers overdue, waiting for me to complete them in “high quality.” It was 1:49 AM, and I hadn’t done anything.
I also had a test the next day about Macroeconomics.
Yet, none of it was my fault.
I got off my bed and slowly dragged myself to the kitchen. I opened the fridge, expecting there to be another can of soda.
There wasn’t.
Waiting for me was only a can of salad sauce and a slip.
Wait, a slip!?
I really needed to calm down. I took a deep breath. The slip could have been written by my mom, my friend who came to my house last night, or even me after drinking too much alcohol. It could have been anyone.
The slip wrote: “L’p zdlqj iru brx. —Ny692”
That was “I’m waiting for you” in Caesar Cipher, written by Ny692.
It couldn’t have been Ny692.
Uhh.
—
Chapter 2
That was a long story.
You know, although I was normal like everyone else, I was literally a member of Rh Center, league 5114. Rh Center was the name they gave to “The Milky Way,” and league 5114 was the local league on Earth.
If you asked me about who “they” were, I would say, aliens. Aliens for Earth people, for Homo sapiens. Specifically, the type of aliens was called Pho, and it was one of the Phos who gave the names to all the centers and leagues—Ny692.
Ny692 was the President of the Universe, and she had power. A lot of power, actually. She could press a button and crash a star. But she wouldn’t press it to destroy Earth, because I was on Earth, and she didn’t want to watch her lover die.
*Ny692 didn’t have a gender. “Female” was her displayed gender; if you were a Pho, you could easily change your displayed gender in “settings.”
That related to the slip. The ciphered words meant that she was waiting for me, and after she picked me up onto the “UFO” (it actually wasn’t a UFO, not even one that looked like a UFO. I was just using “UFO” to make it easy for you dumb humans to understand what was going on), I couldn’t promise she wouldn’t crash Earth.
The reason for crashing Earth was to build a wormhole between Headquarters Gen (you could simply understand it as the “center of the Universe,” or the presidential palace where Ny692 worked) and GxAlpha, another star that had plenty of resources. That was what I heard from my colleagues in league 5114.
*A wormhole was something that could help you quickly pass through time. However, Headquarters Gen had a very powerful time-control system, and the time there wouldn’t be influenced. Building a wormhole saved time for transporting the resources from GxAlpha to the headquarters.
It was awful. It was awful to take a “UFO,” because it made me want to vomit.
Uhh.
I looked on the good side. I could return to my comfy home in Headquarters Gen, I could see Ny692 again, I wouldn’t need to finish my overdue assignments or take the awful test the next day, and most of all, I wouldn’t need to pretend to be a human anymore.
I could be a Pho again.
I was glad about that.
—
Chapter 3
It was 10:32 in the morning.
I was thinking about why Ny692 had stuck the slip in my fridge. It was a stupid choice for telling somebody something. I could definitely prank her about that when I got back to Headquarters 970.
Maybe it was because she knew my habit of drinking soda at midnight.
I got out of bed, got dressed, and washed my face. Then I went straight out the door with nothing in my stomach.
Fresh air. The last time I got to breathe fresh air on Earth.
League 5114 was not far from my home, only a few blocks away. While I was walking there, I was going to tell you humans about who I was and what I did.
I was actually not an ordinary Pho. I was the most intelligent researcher in the universe.
I came to Earth three Earth years before. I was 17 in human age when I first came, and the age of “17” was actually decided by Ny692. Phos who were visiting other stars or planets could decide their age on that celestial body in Headquarters Gen, the same as their appearance, intelligence, and more.
Remember, I was NOT 17 when I came. I was 22. 22 in Pho years. One Pho second equaled one Earth year. That meant I had been on Earth for three Earth years, but that was only three seconds in Headquarters Gen.
Ny692 made me 17 because she wanted me to be tortured by AP.
For that purpose, she made me as dumb as any ordinary human. The worst thing I had ever experienced on Earth was taking Macroeconomics, Microeconomics, World History, Psychology, and Government and Politics: Comparative for my five AP courses.
I ended up only getting a 5 for Macroeconomics and a 4 for the rest.
Bruh.
That was a low score, even for humans. And I was the most intelligent researcher in the universe!
You know why I took those five? Because Ny692 wanted me to dive deep into exploring the humanities with my stupid human brain.
But the purpose for which I came to Earth was to research how societies worked with humans, and that was pretty easy. Being an intelligent Pho, I could easily scan everything on Earth and store it in my Pho brain with my first step on Earth.
So, it turned out Ny692’s real purpose for sticking me on Earth for all three awful Earth years was to make me “suffer.”
“Suffering makes you stronger.”
That was not true.
So that was why I came to Earth. And that was who I was.
I opened the door of league 5114.
—
Chapter 4
League 5114 was a big silver ball on the exterior, similar to an astronomical telescope. They built them that way so that no one would ever doubt its use.
My colleague waved to me as I walked by.
The director of league 5114 flattered me. Only because it was a once-in-a-lifetime chance to meet the most intelligent researcher in the universe.
I felt good being the most intelligent researcher in the universe.
The director led me to the room they had prepared for the “UFO” launch. Everything was ready.
But I was not ready.
I was not ready to take a “UFO.” It made me want to vomit.
With a woman’s voice announcing the launch of the “UFO,” I went up into the sky.
Literally, when you were inside the “UFO,” you couldn’t see what was happening outside. All you could experience were bouts of dizziness and your stomach aching. That was what I was feeling then.
If I were going to compare it to a feeling on Earth, it would be similar to what people felt when they were carsick.
I looked on the good side. It was only a 40-minute flight (in Earth minutes), not so bad. Not as bad as the time I went to IH8801, when I took eight hours to get back to the headquarters.
I didn’t remember what had happened after I came back to the headquarters on that trip. Ny692 told me I had been unconscious for a while, and after I woke up, I looked like I had had too much alcohol.
She must have been very worried that time.
Hope you guys like it👉👈