Comments on: Hangzhou Field Trip: A Mixed Bag of Experiences https://mushroom-scholars.org/hangzhou-field-trip-a-mixed-bag-of-experiences/ Teaching & Learning English Sun, 02 Mar 2025 02:49:48 +0000 hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.5 By: Director Dr Durian https://mushroom-scholars.org/hangzhou-field-trip-a-mixed-bag-of-experiences/comment-page-1/#comment-131 Wed, 22 May 2024 08:22:48 +0000 https://mushroom-scholars.org/?p=10613#comment-131 Consider using images to attract more readers.

]]> By: Director Dr Durian https://mushroom-scholars.org/hangzhou-field-trip-a-mixed-bag-of-experiences/comment-page-1/#comment-130 Wed, 22 May 2024 08:21:48 +0000 https://mushroom-scholars.org/?p=10613#comment-130 Effective title and first paragraph. These invite us to read more of your work.

You have organised this well. Dealing with the negative aspects first in a short paragraph ans then going on to emphasise the positive aspects is a good idea.

I’m wondering if you might have produced a ‘mixed bag’ of AI use and your own writing? Paragraphs 3, 4 and 5 look particularly vague and generic (why no personal details about what you actually did?) and the cohesion feels a bit artificial from the 3rd paragraph.

Were you the only student who went to the theme park? Nobody else has mentioned that. The others were picking tea and trekking. Were you on the same trip?

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